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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26810608">Everything Has Changed</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/moo_moo/pseuds/moo_moo'>moo_moo</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>One Direction (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Captain Niall Horan, Depressed Louis, Depression, M/M, Past Rape/Non-con, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Self-Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, Teacher-Student Relationship, there's a bit of humour somewhere in there</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 08:55:22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Rape/Non-Con</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>15,821</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26810608</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/moo_moo/pseuds/moo_moo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Two years after the life-changing incident that had caused Louis to quit his job at Doncaster High, he retakes his old position as the English Teacher believing that he could go back to his old life. But with triggers all over the school and a certain new student he hadn't had the pleasure to teach before, he realizes that everything has changed...</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, Zayn Malik/Liam Payne</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hiya!<br/>So I originally started writing this story on Wattpad a couple of years ago but then I recently created an account on AO3 recently. So i thought why the hell not, right? So if you're interested, go check out my Wattpad account as well... I'm working on a couple of stuff, both fanfiction and otherwise and yeah, support would mean a lot. </p>
<p>But more importantly, there's a lot of triggering stuff in this fic although I tried to make them not as heavy as I usually like it, because this is my first fic. But PLEASE READ THE TAGS AND IF YOU ARE TRIGGERED BY ANY OF THE TOPICS, PLEASE DO NOT READ. YOUR MENTAL HEALTH MATTERS.</p>
<p>And if you ever need to talk, I'm always open :)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span class="u"><em><strong>Louis' POV</strong> </em> </span>
</p><p>"Mate, are you sure you want to do this? "</p><p>I took a deep breath and nodded trying to ignore my pounding heart. "I'm alright, Zayn. It's been two years now. I'm sure I can handle this. " I have to.... It's the only way I can go back to my old life.<br/>Zayn sighed and shook his head unconvinced, as he parked his car. "I just don't want you to do anything you're not ready for. "</p><p>Zayn. My best mate. He's been there for me at my lowest without any judgement. And I couldn't wish for a better friend. But I just wish he would let me do this; that's the only way I can move on, going back to the place where it all happened- back to my old life.</p><p>"Look, how about this, I'll call you if something happens. "</p><p>Zayn looked at me with an expression which I've grown really familiar to. He was trying to understand what was going through my mind. I looked back unblinking at the black haired Bradford boy I've known almost all my adult life.<br/>Finally he gave in. "I guess that's alright then. But be sure to call me anytime -ANYTIME- okay? "</p><p>He unlocked the door and I got out and nodded.<br/>"Definitely"</p><p>"You know that I just worry about you right?" He asked as we walked towards the school building.<br/>I smile warmly at him letting him know that I appreciate it.<br/>I go to the office to meet the principal before I go to my old classroom. I feel light headed and dizzy as I walk towards my table. I see flashes of that day in my mind as I look around. Thankfully I'd reached school an hour early; I don't think I could've handled all those kids staring at me wondering why I had left and have returned back now. I set my table and write my name on the board before sitting down and checking my phone.</p><p><strong>Zayn:</strong> u ok?</p><p>I rolled my eyes. Typical Zayn checking on me ten minutes after we parted ways.</p><p><strong>Me:</strong> Yes Zayn. I'm okay. I'm at my room waiting for first period.</p><p><strong>Zayn:</strong> any flshbcks yt?</p><p><strong>Me:</strong> A bit here and there but I didn't panic!!</p><p><strong>Zayn:</strong> thts gr8! call me if anythn hppns</p><p><strong>Me:</strong> You know I will</p><p>The bell rang and I heard kids walking by outside in the hallway. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath as someone knocked on the door and entered.</p><p>A lean boy with brown hair and brown puppy eyes look at me and gaped. I knew this was going to happen. Did I do the right thing by coming back? It was going to cause too much of a conspiracy for me to be comfortable with.</p><p>I nod at his direction and ask him to take any seat that he wanted and of course, he goes to the back of the class and sits exactly in the middle.<br/>Liam Payne. That's who he is. He's been here since he started high school. Of course I've never had the liberty of teaching him but one does find out more about students you don't teach in the staff room. He was popular. A jock but yet a nerd. Something so rare at high school. He was an all-rounder in a teachers tongue. I'd seen him around previously and from the looks he was giving me, it seems he knew who I was as well.</p><p>More students enter and soon all but two chairs were filled with teenagers whispering at each other while giving me curious glances. I feel my hands starting to tremble and decide that I had to start class if I didn't want to have a panic attack right in front of everyone on my first day back. Zayn would never let me back in here if that happened.<br/>I clear my throat and stand up when I see the door burst open. I fall back onto my chair in shock before I get up ignoring all the giggles around me to look at whoever barged in late.<br/>In front of me stood the most beautiful human being I've ever had the pleasure of laying my eyes on. I held my breath as his green eyes met my blue.<br/>"Oops!" He said giving me a toothy grin.<br/>"Hi."<br/>That's was all I could say as my eyes raked his body from top to bottom. Wait...WHAT??!! I snapped out of my dreamy state and cross my arms with what I hope was a questioning look.<br/>" Would you like to tell me why you're late for class Mr...... "</p><p>"Styles. Harry Styles"</p><p>Harry.... The name suits him, I think. Him and those luscious chocolate curls...</p><p>"Well, Mr Styles? "</p><p>Harry let's out a beautiful laugh before he motions to the boy next to him who I had only noticed then. "Quite a funny story, actually. You see, Niall here insisted that he had a snack before he came to class and since my locker was the closest, he made me give him a bar of chocolate I had. But while we were coming here, Niall dropped his chocolate so he started licking it off the floo-"</p><p>"Yes Mr. Styles. Quite interesting, I agree. Now if you would be so kind as to take your seats, I could finally start teaching something. "</p><p>To be honest, I wouldn't mind hearing his raspy voice all day... WHAT??!! No!! This is exactly why I had to shut him up. I can't let him do this to me.<br/>With a final chuckle, Harry walked past me and sat next to Liam with Niall right next to him. Liam looked at the both of them with a disapproving yet fond look on his face before shaking his head and looking back at me. If i had to guess I would say they were good friends.</p><p>"Hello everyone! My name is Louis Tomlinson, officially Mr Tomlinson. That makes me sound old but unfortunately, you guys have to call me by that name. Now, before I start this year, I would really like to get to know all for you better. So, start up a journal and start writing something about yourself. Also, if you would like to get to know something about me, feel free to add questions that I would be answering next class. "</p><p>The class looked up with interest and I immediately realized that what I had just said might not have been a good idea. I guess I can start expecting questions on my 2 year disappearance. well, what's done is done, I guess. I let out a loud sigh and retreated back to my desk, giving them some space to do their work.</p><p> </p><p>I spent my time looking around at the class and notice Harry glancing at me from time to time. The next time he looked, I caught him red-handed and expected him to turn away embarrassed. But instead, he smiled at me and winked.</p><p>He winked.</p><p>I could feel my heart beating faster as the moments passed and something seemed to choke me on my throat. This feeling was something I had become familiar with and I knew I had to do something before I had a full fledged panic attack in front of twenty seniors.</p><p>He winked.</p><p>"Excuse me. " I squeaked as I rushed out and grabbed my phone from my pocket hitting speed dial and ringing Zayn. It was that damn wink that did me in. That was how it had all started the last time.</p><p>"Louis, are you okay? "</p><p>He winked.</p><p>I tried to tell him what had happened but I couldn't work my voice. I was breathing so hard by then that I was sure Zayn could understand what was happening. A sob was all I could get out before I wrapped my arms around myself in those empty hallways with years flowing freely through my face.</p><p>He winked.</p><p>He winked.</p><p>He winked.</p><p>Why did he have to wink?!</p><p>Suddenly a pair of arms wrapped around me and I flinched feeling my panic rise to yet a higher level.</p><p>"Shhh..... It's just me Louis. You're okay. No one's gonna hurt you. I'm here... " Zayn's voice reached me and I let myself be touched by my best friend. He wouldn't hurt me.</p><p>Zayn started humming a tune I was familiar with.</p><p>You tell me that you're sad and lost your way<br/>You tell me that your tears are here to stay<br/>But I know you're only hiding<br/>And I just wanna see you</p><p>You tell me that you're hurt and you're in pain<br/>And I can see your head is held in shame,<br/>But I just wanna see you smile again<br/>See you smile again</p><p>But don't burn out<br/>Even if you scream and shout<br/>It'll come back to you<br/>And I'll be here for you</p><p>Oh I will carry you over<br/>Fire and water for your love<br/>And I will hold you closer<br/>Hope your heart is strong enough<br/>When the night is coming down on you<br/>We will find a way through the dark</p><p>I wish that I could take you to the stars<br/>I'd never let you fall and break your heart<br/>And if you wanna cry or fall apart<br/>I'll be there to hold you</p><p>You tell me that you hurt, it's all in vain<br/>But I can see your heart can love again<br/>And I remember you laughing<br/>So let's just laugh again</p><p>But don't burn out<br/>Even if you scream and shout<br/>It'll come back to you, back to you</p><p>"Sing with me, Lou" Zayn says and I calm down enough to join him.</p><p>Oh I will carry you over<br/>Fire and water for your love<br/>And I will hold you closer<br/>Hope your heart is strong enough<br/>When the night is coming down on you<br/>We will find a way through the dark</p><p>And you don't need<br/>You don't need to worry<br/>And you will see it's easy to be loved<br/>I know you wanna be loved</p><p>Oh I will carry you over<br/>Fire and water for your love</p><p>Oh I will carry you over<br/>Fire and water for your love<br/>And I will hold you closer<br/>Hope your heart is strong enough<br/>When the night is coming down on you<br/>We will find a way through the dark</p><p>Oh I will carry you over<br/>Fire and water for your love<br/>And I will hold you closer<br/>Hope your heart is strong enough<br/>When the night is coming down<br/>We will find a way through the dark</p><p>By the time the song ended, I had started breathing slow enough and had also stopped crying. I just sat there in Zayn arms thanking him for being there with me. This song meant a lot to me. I had written it while I was still rock bottom hoping that someone would save me and that was when Zayn made me realized that he was a constant in my life. He learnt this song for my sake to lift me up with hope when I felt down. And the fact that he was a good singer just made it even better.</p><p>"You okay now? "</p><p>I nodded as I walked towards the boys toilet and washed my face before going back to the hallway. Zayn looked at me waiting for an explanation but I just waved him off telling him that I'll tell him later.<br/>"Both of us left a set of teenagers on their own for about an hour. I think we should get back to class before we have a reason to hand out detentions." I said before we part ways.</p><p>"Time's up, guys! If all of you could just pass all of your journals up to the front, I promise to look through them and answer all of your questions tomorrow. "<br/>The kids moved out as I stacked up the journals and put them in my briefcase.<br/>I fell onto my chair with a groan and palms on my face when I heard someone clear their throat. It was him- the kid that seemed to make my heart beat faster.... But in a good way somehow.<br/>"Are you okay? "<br/>I nod my head. He cocked his head to the side and bit his lip trying to read me and I feel my jeans getting tighter.<br/>"See ya later, Mr. T. "</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span class="u">
    <em>
      <b>Harry's POV</b>
    </em>
  </span>
</p>
<p>I sat down for lunch along with Liam and Niall who were, as usual,  bickering like idiots.</p>
<p>"Seriously,  Niall!  You can't just roam around the whole school five minutes before the bell rings! You're lucky that you didn't get detention from Mr. Tomlinson after that stupid explanation. "</p>
<p>Niall turned at that moment and looked at me with pleading eyes.</p>
<p>"Speaking of which,  where had you gone Liam? " I asked as I sat down facing them. "I mean, it seriously shouldn't have taken you about half an hour in the bathroom. "</p>
<p>Liam blushed and mumbled something too quietly for us to understand. It was obvious that he was seeing someone and had ditched us to see that lucky person. The way he glanced around the hallways and car parking every day and the way he permanently blushes during art class are perfect giveaways.  But what I don't understand is why he didn't  tell us about whoever it is. <br/>I'm sure both Niall and I would approve of her. Liam's too sensible to get himself into a serious mess.<br/>We're really close - all three of us - even though we haven't known each other for so long, but I know that I won't be on my own for anything, ever, now that I've met them. They will always be with me. <br/>I came to this school last year after my family moved from Holmes Chapel, Cheshire. <br/>I had been picking at my food on the same table we were at right now when these two walked towards me from opposite directions and sat down at my table at the same time. <br/>And that was how I became friends with Niall, who was here a year before me and Liam, the most popular guy in school</p>
<p>"Harry! "<br/>I looked at Niall with a raise of an eyebrow.</p>
<p>"Where had your mind wandered off to, mate? Liam here still hasn't told us who he's dating behind our backs"<br/>Liam was squirming in his seat munching on his chips and the sight was just too funny to handle. I burst out laughing.</p>
<p>"Let him be, Niall. He'll tell us when he wants us to know."</p>
<p>*********</p>
<p>I see Mr. T hugging the art teacher Mr. Malik before both of them get into the same car and drive off and I feel like someone has stabbed me in the chest. Hmmm...... I wonder why...</p>
<p>The whole day,  I couldn't keep my mind off the new teacher with ocean blue eyes and soft feathery brown hair. He seemed so sweet and innocent but there was an air of mystery around him that drew me to him. He had seemed so closed up when I saw him before in class but right there with Mr. Malik, he looked so happy. It made me wonder if there was anything going on between the two of them.</p>
<p>"Haz,  what's wrong? "<br/>I shrug my shoulders. "Just wondering if Mr. T and Mr. Malik were a thing. I just saw them get in a car together. "</p>
<p>Liam frowned thinking about what I had said but Niall rolled his eyes as we started walking home.</p>
<p>Five minutes later, Niall threw his arms up in the air with a sigh. <br/>"That's it! What has gotten into you two today ?! Harry has been in extreme thinker mode since morning and now you Liam? It's like walking with two zombies. "</p>
<p>I let out a chuckle and threw my arms around Niall. <br/>"Aww, Nialler!  Didn't know you felt left out. Maybe you should get a brain so that you can join us. Right,  Liam? "</p>
<p>But it seemed like Liam was still thinking hard about something. His face was fixed into such a deep frown that I worried that it would be permanent. Ni and I looked at each other and shrugged before we parted ways to our houses.</p>
<p>***************<br/><b><em><span class="u">Louis' POV</span></em></b></p>
<p>I sat down on the sofa with a pile of journals to grade and prepared myself for the numerous amount of questions about my past that were surely there. Zayn had gone to the park to work on his new piece which he refused to show me saying that it was private! I mean,  I didn't even know that word existed amongst us! We helped each other discover our sexualities for goodness sake! <br/>He's been going to the park quite frequently since the end of the last year and it's making me curious about this art piece he was doing.<br/>Anyway, back to the task at hand. <br/>I flipped open a journal on top of the pile.</p>
<p>
  <em>My name is James Corden and I'm a senior at school here. I love making people laugh and stuff. I might as well be a talk show host when I'm older.....................</em>
</p>
<p>And finally the question.</p>
<p>
  <em>My question for you sir, is where have you been these past two years?</em>
</p>
<p>I knew this was coming. I note down the question and opened another journal. This was from someone name Charlotte or Charlie as she was called. <br/>I wonder what Lottie was doing back at home these days. I had cut contacts with my family after what had happened. I really must call them sometime.</p>
<p>
  <em>And my question is.... Do you have a girlfriend?</em>
</p>
<p>I scoff as I put away the journal. Typical hormonal, teenage girl. And the fact that I was only four years elder to them did not help at all. It was even worse the last time I had taught. I had only been two years elder than the seniors then and it had caused quite a commotion at school.</p>
<p>The fact that I had skipped a couple of grades when I was at school meant that I had graduated when I was 16 while most of my classmates were 18 already. And that was why I had become a teacher at the age of 20 while the others we're at least four years older than me. Zayn too had somehow started the same time as I had and let me tell you, being the youngest teachers at school gave you a lot of unnecessary attention. And Zayn being as hot as he was,  had a fanbase following him at school.</p>
<p>I did too, though it was nothing compared to Zayn's. <br/>And let's just say I haven't had a good experience with them. Especially with five of them. The boys who ruined my life. The reason I had to quit. The reason I had to go for countless number of therapy sessions and swallow antidepressants every day.</p>
<p>I take a deep breath before I continue with the journals. The questions go on and on all about the same thing</p>
<p>
  <em>Why did you leave two years back?</em>
</p>
<p>Where were you when you went <em>MIA</em>?</p>
<p>
  <em>Is it true that you killed 5 students and you were in jail?</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Is it true that you left cuz you were pregnant with Mr. Malik's kid?</em>
</p>
<p>I laugh at that. That was something I had to show Zayn when he came back. I can't believe there were so many rumors about why I was missing!  The things these kids come up with!</p>
<p>When I picked up Liam's book,  I was sure I was going to encounter another question about my absence.</p>
<p>
  <em>Sorry,  but I have more than one question... </em>
  <br/>
  <em>How close are you and Mr. Malik? </em>
  <em>How long have you guys been friends? Do you guess share everything with each other?</em>
</p>
<p>Oh. Looks like someone has a crush on Zayn. That wasn't something new but I never expected Liam to be gay. I wonder if Zayn knows about this...</p>
<p>The door unlocked and Zayn entered at that moment with his bag of brushes and paints and a cloth-covered canvas.</p>
<p>"Zayn come here for a moment please. "<br/>I looked him right in the eye with a grim face. <br/>"Liam Payne,  huh? "</p>
<p>Zayn's eyes widened with shock and.....fear? and his jaw went slack<br/>"W-what?"<br/>I burst out laughing while Zayn stood there confused. <br/>"Mate,  I think a certain student has a crush on you and it seems to be a huge one. "<br/>I hand him Liam's journal and watch his face as he reads the questions. It almost seems fond. I wonder why.....</p>
<p>He silently hands the book back and I could feel him going into his thinking mode. <br/>"Here,  read this. " I say giving him another journal and he bursts out laughing after a quick glance. <br/>"Why didn't I know about this? I'm the father, Goddammit..!! "</p>
<p>I chuckle. Mission successful. <br/>"Why would anyone think I had a baby with you? Why would anyone think I could get pregnant?! "</p>
<p>Zayn replied " Because, believe it or not,  half the student population believes were dating. "<br/>WHAT?!  How did I not know about this..?? <br/>Zayn smirked <br/>" Because you are an oblivious fool. And yes, you said that out loud. " He went to his room and slammed the door shut.</p>
<p>Why would anyone think the both of us are dating? We've been completely platonic except for that one time we kissed each other to make sure we're gay. But no one knows about that.</p>
<p>I take Niall's journal in my hand and flip through it till I reach the question</p>
<p>
  <em>Do </em>
  <em>you</em>
  <em> mind me eating food in class?</em>
</p>
<p>Seriously? That kid really loves his food, doesn't he? I picked up the next journal knowing exactly who's it was</p>
<p>
  <em>HARRY STYLES</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>You'll know me well in good time without this essay. </em>
  <br/>
  <em>Are you gay? </em>
  <br/>
  <em>Hey! That rhymes!</em>
</p>
<p>Wow. This kid was something else, wasn't he? I don't think I've ever seen someone with such a free spirit.</p>
<p>I hear a door open and find Zayn sitting beside me. <br/>"Are you going to explain what happened today? "</p>
<p>The light mood suddenly felt dense and thick.</p>
<p>"If you promise you won't stop me from going back tomorrow. "</p>
<p>Zayn looked conflicted but he nodded eventually. I tell him about Harry and how he winked.</p>
<p>"Lou,  you know that just because that's what happened last time doesn't mean it will again, right? "</p>
<p>Yes, I did. But my paranoia didn't.</p>
<p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span class="u">
    <em>
      <b>Harry's POV</b>
    </em>
  </span>
</p><p>I rushed to the classroom with my books, hoping that I wouldn't get detention because I was late two days in a row. I bumped onto someone as I turned the corner.</p><p>"Sorry! I'm so......... Liam? "</p><p>"No time to explain. We're late. "</p><p>Liam started dragging me to the classroom and burst open the door. Mr. Tomlinson stood there in front of the class with a bunch of journals in his hand and looked at us with raised eyebrows.</p><p>"Mr. Styles, before I hear your story today, I would like to know if this is going to be a daily occurrence. If it is, I would have to schedule my hours after school every day to sit with you in an empty classroom with not a sound coming from both of us. And I see that Liam is your accomplice this time."<br/>His eyes locked into mine as he finished his speech and I felt myself get lost in them. My attention shifted into his kissable lips and I could feel myself licking my own. <br/>And it dawned on me. <br/>HOLY SHIT!! I might kinda like my teacher.</p><p>I felt a jab and I felt reality ruin my life. Everyone was staring at me waiting for a reply and I could see Niall at the very back hitting himself on the head, probably wondering how he had such an idiotic friend.</p><p>"No story this time sir; I just overslept and it won't happen again. I don't know why Liam was late though."</p><p>"Same reason. " Liam mumbled as Mr. T waved us to our seats.</p><p>"What do you mean the same reason? You were here in school before the bell rang! You ditched me saying you had to go to the locker room. " Niall hissed as we sat down.</p><p>I looked from Liam to Niall wondering curiously what excuse he would give us today. Probably something about falling asleep there...</p><p>"I must have fallen asleep there because I woke up to the bell," Liam mumbled. See! What did I tell you? That boy is definitely hiding something from us.</p><p>***********************<br/><span class="u"><em><b>Louis' POV</b></em></span></p><p>He was staring at my lips! I caught him doing it. God, this is bad. It can't happen again... Why was everything that happened once happening again in the same manner?</p><p>I could feel the panic rise into my chest but I knew I couldn't leave the class without giving them any work. But I had to hand out the journals and answer the questions before anything else.</p><p>I try to ignore the uneasiness felt and handed out the journals before bringing out the list of questions.</p><p>" Okay.. First question... "</p><p>I kept answering every question as truthfully as I could simply explaining that I had some personal problems to tend to during these past 2 years causing me to quit. The students seemed quite satisfied with that and so I explained no more.</p><p>"This was a pretty amusing question, to be honest...</p><p>Is it true that you left cuz you were pregnant with Mr. Malik's kid? "</p><p>Loud chuckles erupt from around the classroom. But my eyes shift to the brunette boy with Brown eyes at the back. Liam looks shocked and upset. It was now obvious to me that he liked Zayn. I guess I just have to answer and get him out of his misery.</p><p>"Why would you even think that I could get pregnant? Seems like someone's read a lot of 'fun flicks' " I say with a smirk.</p><p>"You mean fan fiction. "</p><p>"Yeah, that. " I said nodding my head to the kid who had spoken.</p><p>"Moving on...someone asked me if I would mind students eating in class. To be honest, I don't, provided I get some too and that the classes are not disrupted but that doesn't mean it's allowed. So.... Nope. Sorry. " Niall literally looked devastated.</p><p>"Ah... Yes! Seems like someone has a little crush on a certain art teacher. Aaand... I guess I shouldn't have said that. Zayn is gonna kill me. "<br/>I look at Liam while answering the question explaining how he was just my best mate and how we never keep secrets. And Liam just shifted awkwardly in his seat, avoiding me.</p><p>Last question</p><p>"Am I gay, someone asked. Yes, yes I am. "</p><p>There were loud whispers at that and I realize that I might be the first openly gay teacher they've had. I ignore all the curious stares I got and set them to work on writing about something that's troubled them and how they got over it, if they did. <br/>"Your stories will be purely confidential but I don't want you guys to write anything you're not comfortable speaking about. But what you write becomes more beautiful the more sentiment you have attached to it."</p><p>***********************</p><p>"Mr. Tomlinson, I am so sorry I came in late today. "</p><p>"It's fine, Liam. Now if you would excuse me, I have to go meet up with Zayn at the coffee shop across the street since both of us have free periods. "</p><p>I walked away only to hear him call my name before I even turned the corner.</p><p>"I don't have a crush on him... " Liam whispered. But I shook my head and smiled down at him or actually up at him considering the fact that he was taller than me. That's a good height considering that I'm 5 '9.</p><p>"I know you do bud. Don't worry I won't tell anyone. But I think Zayn already knows . DON'T FREAK OUT!! "</p><p>Liam looked at me confused.<br/>"Why would I freak out? "</p><p>"Because, oh I don't know, I just told you that your crush might know about your feelings.... Why aren't you freaking out? Is everyone like this these days? GOD! What is up with the kids of today? "</p><p>And Liam just kept staring at me as though I spoke out a bunch of bull. And I have no idea why.</p><p>"Yo Payno! I've been looking all over for you mate... Hey Mr. T. "<br/>I saw Harry walk towards us and Liam gives me a glance begging at me not to say anything...or that's what I interpreted it as.</p><p>"I guess I'll see you tomorrow,sir."</p><p>"By Mr. Tommo! "Harry called out as Liam joined him. A nickname already? Not good.</p><p>*********************</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>
      <span class="u">Harry's POV</span>
    </em>
  </b>
</p><p>There's something about Mr. T that just makes me want to hold him close and kiss every part of him that I can. <br/>Yes,  I have come to terms with my feelings and I know that I have a crush on him.</p><p>And I have to say that I really do have a good taste in men. Louis prove a that.</p><p>But what drew me the most to him were those walls that he had built up around him. <br/>And I find myself trying to break the down even though I try my best not to.</p><p>Some day, I'm going to get to know the real him.  The real Louis Tomlinson behind the cool teacher role he plays.</p><p>**********************</p><p>"Liam,  what were you doing with Mr. T ? "<br/>I ask after a couple of hours of playing FIFA at my house.</p><p>"Just school stuff. "</p><p>Niall and I looked at each other and realized that we both knew that Liam was lying. <br/>Liam must have noticed that we were unconvinced because he spoke again.</p><p>" I went to apologize for being late today but then we ended up talking about that entry we wrote in the journal today. He kinda knew what I wrote about. "</p><p>That seemed believable. Well... There was nothing much to talk about then. <br/>I shrugged and was about to go down to get something to eat when Niall spoke up.</p><p>" Speaking of which,  why were you late today? And don't speak shit about falling asleep in the locker room because you told me that you slept 'better than you have in months' when I asked you why you were so....... happy. "</p><p>I shot back to the ground below Liam's feet and crossed my own.</p><p>"Checkmate, buddy. Tell us now. "</p><p>Liam knew that he was trapped and from the way he kept looking around the room,  I knew that he was trying to find an escape. <br/>The moment he finally realized there was no way out, a pout formed on his lips and overall,  he looked like a scared puppy.</p><p>"I'm seeing someone. "</p><p>Niall and I nodded. "And...? "</p><p>Liam looked surprised.</p><p>"You knew? "</p><p>Niall snorted and started laughing hysterically.</p><p>"Mate, that was pretty obvious. What we don't understand is what made you keep it a secret from us. "</p><p>I nodded. "Yeah. We're best mates, right? "</p><p>"Who is she mate? "</p><p>He refused to meet our eyes. He kept staring at the ground. In the end, he mumbled something I couldn't understand. Niall though, on hearing what Liam said went up to him and hugged him.</p><p>"You know that doesn't change anything, don't you? "</p><p>Liam looked at me with a questioning look.</p><p>"What? "<br/>Niall glared at me with an overly threatening look on his face.</p><p>"Are you okay with me being ........ gay? "</p><p>Oh... <br/>OH!!</p><p>"No problems mate, considering that I would be a hypocrite if I thought being gay was wrong. "</p><p>I let out a small laugh</p><p>And that's when it hit me. I'd never told them that I liked guys... Mainly because it never came up. But also because I never thought it was important as I never liked anyone here until...... </p><p>
  <em>Louis Tomlinson</em>
</p><p>With his ocean blue eyes that I want to dive into and his angelic voice that makes my day everyday.....</p><p>Niall and Liam, we're still gaping at me as though I'd just told them that I was an alien. And maybe that wasn't too far off.</p><p>"You're gay?! "</p><p>I scratched my neck awkwardly.<br/>"Uh- Bi. "<br/>This was awkward...</p><p>"Guys,  we were talking about Liam's mystery man here! I'm sorry I didn't say this before. Let move on now shall we? "</p><p>Niall nodded. <br/>"So Liam, who is this guy? Do we know him? Does he go to our school? "</p><p>"Yes you do but neither of us want anyone to know of our relationship. "</p><p>"That includes us? "</p><p>Liam just nodded. And we accepted that.</p><p>"So Harry" Niall said now turning to me and I groaned. I should have seen this coming. "Why didn't you tell us you played for both teams? "</p><p>I shrugged hating this newly cast attention on me. <br/>"Wasn't important...."</p><p>"Meaning you didn't like anyone this past year. " Liam asked and I confirmed. "So what changed that now?  Or should I say who? "<br/>Liam wiggled his eyebrows teasing me.</p><p>I roll my eyes at his behavior and get up to go down for real this time. <br/>"The only person here with an existing love life is you, my baby Lima Bean ."</p><p>"Wow, I really need to get a girlfriend" Is what I hear from Niall just before I close the door. </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>
    <em>Louis' POV</em>
  </b>
</p><p>A month had passed since I rejoined the school and I have to say that I think that was the best decision I had ever taken. My flashbacks had almost completely faded and I could walk around the whole school without fear. My panic attacks had ceased to small mini attacks lasting only a couple of seconds and I rarely got them in any case.</p><p>But there was one person who made me feel vulnerable again.</p><p>Harry had approached me several times during the previous month with small, almost flirtatious gestures and everything made me think about Them. The way They had become friends of mine outside school and how They made me trust them only to..... ruin me eventually.</p><p>And though my heart told me that he was trustworthy,  my mind warned me to stay away reminding me of the last time I let a student in.</p><p>And of course,  I wasn't brave enough to listen to my heart. I wasn't going to take another chance.</p><p>The door opened and Harry came in with a bright smile that caused my heart to flutter. Wait... What was he doing here? School only started after an hour.</p><p>"Hey Mr. T, had to leave from home early. Mind if I stay here? "</p><p>Yes, I do mind! You make me feel weak. You shouldn't be here. <br/>But even though my mind screamed out all of this,  I couldn't help but nod my head. <br/>"Sure."</p><p>Thankfully he seemed to be going to his seat at the very back.. Oh no. Wait... No... Urgh.</p><p>He placed his books onto his table and turned around to walk up towards me. <br/>"Hey,  Mr. T? "</p><p>"Hmm? "</p><p>"Why do I get the feeling that you don't like me? "<br/>Does he think that I don't like him?</p><p>"I like you, Harry. It's just.. "<br/>I wave my hand dismissing the topic. I can't let him know what he does to me. Both the good and the bad.</p><p>"Just what Louis? " He asked placing his hand on mine and staring into my shallow greyish eyes with his life filled ones.</p><p>And as I looked on into his wonderful eyes, his face morphed into another's and within seconds,  I was seeing Him in front of me. Harry's sweet smile turned into the sinister grin I had endured for a month and his soft hands warped into coarse dirty hands which had done dirty things to me. And I suddenly felt so dirty. As dirty as I felt in the beginning.</p><p>I shook my head to stop myself from destroying the progress I've been making and take my hand away from his.</p><p>"This!  Exactly this! What do you think you're doing flirting with me? I am your teacher and also the last person you should be doing this to. Look,  you would get a lot of kids your age to go to bed with you. Isn't that what you want? So leave me alone! "</p><p>I got up from my chair by the end of my monologue and stalked out of the classroom - but not before I saw the heartbroken? Nah! Just disappointed face of the beautiful person I left behind. <br/>I slammed the door shut as I entered Zayn's classroom.</p><p>I still had my eyes closed and I was breathing heavily, trying them to get them in order before I look into Zayn's questions of what happened.</p><p>I stood there for God knows how long until I felt someone brush past me and I jumped.</p><p>I heard the door slam closed but saw no one when I opened my eyes and turned around. Zayn just sat in the front of his classroom with a curious and anxious look.</p><p>Awww... Poor guy!  He was so worried about me.</p><p>"Who just went out, Zayn? Because obviously, no one came in"</p><p>"W-what?  N-no one. "</p><p>That was really fishy. Zayn never stuttered. Not unless he was lying. But I guess I could leave him alone this time. Must've just been some random bird he picked up somewhere along the way here.</p><p>"So,  what's wrong Louis? "</p><p>"Everything, Zayn.  Thought I was getting better but I...... "</p><p>"Aww, sweetheart." Zayn reached out and tried to move my hand but that just made me throw him away from me and push myself away.</p><p>"Louis, love, don't do this to yourself. Take your hands off." He cooed softly.</p><p>Oh. I never realized that I had started scratching myself with my hands. I drew quite a lot of blood too.</p><p>" I just feel so fooking dirty all the time. "<br/>I was sobbing now. A literal mess at a corner of a classroom.</p><p>I could feel Zayn's presence next to me in spite of not touching me anywhere. <br/>He sat next to me talking about all the memories we had shared in the past and soon,  I forgot that I had even had an episode.</p><p>We had moved from the corner and shifted to Zayn's place. I sat down on his table and he, on his chair.</p><p>As I let out a small giggle at some nonsense that came out of Z's mouth, we heard a tiny cough behind me and turned around to see half of Zayn's students staring at us with wide eyes.</p><p>"Kiss him!" Someone yelled from behind and both Zayn's and I rolled my eyes at him.</p><p>"We're just friends, Isaac," Zayn replied after I jumped off his table.</p><p>"Well kids, I didn't notice the time because of my lovely best mate here. Now,  if you would excuse me, I have my own class to get to. "</p><p>I sprinted down the hallways to my class which was.... closeby.</p><p>"Sorry, I'm late class. Didn't notice the time. "<br/>I walked up to the board and wrote down today's lesson plan.</p><p>All through class,  I made sure that I avoided looking at Harry.  I could literally feel the thousands of questions that we're running through his mind at the moment.</p><p>But Liam seemed to look at me the same way. He looked worried and curious. Shit! Did Harry tell him what had happened?</p><p>Seems like he had because there was no other reason for Liam to look at me that way. <br/>Niall on the other hand seemed pretty oblivious about his friends curiosity as he kept munching on a bar of chocolate under his table and I pretended that I didn't notice. Either that, or he just decided that it was none of his business.</p><p>I could only sigh in relief as class ended and the students trailed out. This was the most stressful class that I had to teach with Harry's constant moves and Liam's crush on Zayn and the anxiety that we were together.</p><p>"Mr. Tomlinson?  Are you okay? "</p><p>Liam looked up at me with a confused look and I couldn't help but smile at the sweet boy's inquiry.</p><p>"I'm fine Liam. Just a little tired from reading all your journals last night. "</p><p>Liam furrowed his brows. It was obviously a shit excuse and Liam obviously saw through it. But thankfully he just nodded and left with a goodbye.</p><p>As classes went on,  snickers we're heard from time to time which I guess were from students who witnessed Zayn and I in class the first period.</p><p>When were these kids even going to accept that 'Zouis',  a name they apparently put for us,  was just a bromance and nothing else?</p><p>The lunch bell rang and as usual,  students were out of the door even before I could dismiss them.</p><p>But then,  Harry slipped into the room and closed the door behind him.</p><p>"I told you to leave me alone! "</p><p>"Louis, are you okay? "</p><p>Both of us spoke at the same time.</p><p>Harry sighed. "No. I won't leave until we talk about this. Louis,  are you okay babe? "</p><p>"Don't call me that!  And it's Mr. Tomlinson to you. Not Louis or babe or sweet cheeks or whatever you've been calling me this whole time. " I snapped at him.</p><p>He held in his hands up in defense before saying<br/>"Mr. Tomlinson,  I'm sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable this morning. "</p><p>I could feel myself start to tremble. <br/>"No, you're not. You just want it to have your way with me. I've seen too many of you to fall for your tricks. "</p><p>"Listen,  Mr. T,  I really like you. I promise I do. It's not about the sex. It's about.... "</p><p>Harry started walking towards me trying to reduce the distance between us but I refused. I kept walking backward until finally, I felt my back hit the wall.</p><p>Oh no.</p><p>Harry walked up and stood so close to me. So close that he towered over me with his hands placed on on the wall beside my head and our chests almost touching.</p><p>Oh no.  It's going to happen again! It's too late now. He's not going to let me leave. He wouldn't let me escape.</p><p>"You. Us. I know you want it too. "</p><p>He closed the distance between our lips and I found myself getting lost in them. But in spite of the calm his lips brought to mine,  my heart threatened to break out of my body with the intensity that it was beating in.</p><p>I could feel tears fall freely off my eyes as I pushed him off and ran out of the classroom into the populated corridors. I walked slowly with my head held down until I reached the car parking and thankfully no one noticed me.</p><p>Or so I thought.</p><p>As I got into the car and started the car,  someone got in beside me. My whole body tensed on wondering who it could be and what they were doing here and I didn't even dare to look at the intruder.</p><p>I let out a tiny sob and whimper as I sat there trying to get a grip.</p><p>"I'll take you home. You're not fit enough to drive now. "</p><p>I could recognize that voice anywhere. <br/>Zayn was here now. Zayn would keep me safe. Zayn won't let anyone hurt me.</p><p>We exchanged seats and were now on the way to our shared flat.</p><p>***********<br/><b><em><span class="u">Warning: Rape scene ahead.  If you don't want to read or if you find it triggering,  please skip the italic part.</span></em></b></p><p>
  <em>"Hey, Lou. "</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I could feel myself shiver as I felt the warm breath fall on my neck. He was back again.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"S-stan.. "</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"That's right babe. It's me."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I felt the thick strong arms of my burly tormentor encircle my lean waist and just like that, tears erupted from my eyes.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Now now, Louis,  you've been a good boy this past month not telling anyone of what I do to you. You've stopped fighting too haven't you? "</em>
</p><p>
  <em>His filthy arms played with my shirt as he put his arms inside it and tweaked my nipples. </em>
  <br/>
  <em>I hated the fact that my body reacted to his touch though it didn't want to. But I also knew that it would've been worse if it hadn't.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I shuddered as his hand slipped into my pants and boxers all in one go and palmed me.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He ripped off my clothes and turned me around on my desk.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He pushed into me without any warning,  and I could've sworn that he tore me open yet again. </em>
  <br/>
  <em>Pain exploded all over my body as he moved in and out pounding in me harder than he even had in this past month</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He finally came in me and pulled me up by my hair before he dragged me through the school corridors naked with his come leaking out of me and dripping down my legs.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Please Stan.." I sobbed but he didn't listen.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Shut up!" He said as he slapped me and pushed me into the boys' bathroom.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And my heart dropped as I saw four of his friends standing inside -naked and hard.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And as I was pushed down onto the bathroom floor with two of them inside me and two inside my mouth, I knew I would never be the same again...</em>
</p><p>
  <em>******************</em>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>
      <span class="u">You can read now if you stopped before.</span>
    </em>
  </b>
</p><p>"Lou,  we're here. "</p><p>I snapped out of my daydream and followed Zayn into our house.</p><p>He took me to the bathroom and rubbed a wet cloth over all the scratches I had made on my skin on our way here. I stared at the cloth as it formed red patches which disappeared when the cloth was washed. Zayn bandaged my arms and lead me onto the living room.</p><p>He laid me down on the sofa with a blanket and some cookies before he turned to leave.</p><p>"I'll leave you now, Tommo. But we're talking about this even if you don't want to, yeah? "</p><p>I just stared ahead with not a reaction until the door closed.</p><p>Then I burst out crying again. <br/>The dirty feeling crept all over me and I knew that it coursed through my blood. And I had to get rid of it.</p><p>Nothing made sense anymore. Nothing other than the fact that the only way to reduce this disgusting feel was to let out a bit of blood. <br/>I had been clean for 5 months now. Did I want to break that streak?  No. But I remembered how it used to help me feel cleansed in spite of the guilt and pain and I craved for that relief.</p><p>And I was so sure that just once would be enough. So it didn't matter,  did it?</p><p>I took out the blade from my razor and dragged it along my skin. But I didn't stop at one. The feeling was so addicting that I let the steel glide through my skin again and again until I was satisfied.</p><p>I put my bandage back on and sat back eating some cookies.<br/>Now,  Zayn won't know until it heals. Maybe he won't know at all. <br/><br/><br/><br/></p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>
    <em>Harry's POV</em>
  </b>
</p><p>My mind kept going back to the scene in the classroom. What had happened there with Louis? I had known for sure that he would reject me when I kissed him but I never expected him to become so upset.</p><p>My heart aches whenever I remembered that I had made Louis cry. He was an angel and he never deserved anything wrong happening to him. <br/>Nothing but Louis went through my mind the whole day. Nothing mattered more than figuring out what went wrong.</p><p>"HARRY!! "</p><p>"Huh? "</p><p>Niall threw his arms in the air because of what I think is frustration....... with me... I think...</p><p>"What is wrong with both of you?! First Liam kept avoiding us all summer and even now and now, you keep spacing out on us. And where the heck did you go during lunch today? "</p><p>My mind went back to Louis and his beautiful face. Those eyes that didn't deserve to be wet in spite of being ocean blue and that cute little nose which gave you a bittersweet feeling when it scrunched up when he cried...</p><p>"HARRY!! "</p><p>Not again.....</p><p>"You are going to tell us what happened today that's making you act like you have the whole world on your shoulders. "</p><p>Liam snickered even though both Niall and I glared at him.</p><p>"And YOU Liam, are even worse. I understand that you don't want us to know who you're dating though I don't understand why, we are your best mates and we care about you. So if we don't meet this guy you're seeing, you are at least letting us speak to him. "</p><p>It was my turn to laugh then.</p><p>Niall turned around to look at me.<br/>Uh-oh.....</p><p>"Well? "</p><p>"Well, what? " I ask dumbly. Anything to delay the inevitable. <br/>Maybe not. The look on Niall's face was just too scary to even consider escaping.</p><p>"I kissed someone... " I mumbled staring at Liam's bedroom floor <b>(A/N: see what I did there?) </b>praying that they didn't hear me. <br/>One look at them told me otherwise.</p><p>"What? Who? " Liam asked me. <br/>I faced him with an innocent smile and batted my eyelashes at him.</p><p>"And why would I tell you, Liam? "</p><p>Niall let out a snort in approval that made me grin and made Liam pout.</p><p>"What happened, anyway? " Niall asked. And with that, I could feel my grin slowly falling off my face.</p><p>I felt two pairs of arms wrap around me comfortingly.</p><p>"Do you wanna talk about it? "</p><p>I shake my head to tell them no.</p><p>"Do you wanna talk about him? " Niall always knew ways to get me talking. <br/>I nod my head this time and sat up straight. <br/>"Well, you can start by telling us his name. " Liam! I swear!</p><p>"Oii.!! Did you havta go and spoil the mood there, Leeyum ya fucking shower of cunts? "</p><p>I laugh at Niall's thick Irish accent which only came out when he was proper annoyed with something. I started opening my mouth to start speaking again when Liam's phone which was on the bedside table starts to ring.</p><p>Both Niall and Liam dash for it at the same time and soon, all I can see are two boys toppled over each other trying to grab something from the ground.</p><p>"Aha! " Niall stood up victorious as he threw the phone over to me. <br/>And I had one glance over at the contact name before Liam snatched the phone from me and answered the call.</p><p>"Hey, babe! "</p><p>Was that really who I thought it was?</p><p>"Uh-huh, I'll see ya tomorrow. I understand babe."</p><p>No way...</p><p>" Love you too. "</p><p>"WAIT A MINUTE!! "<br/>Niall's voice snapped me out of my shock. There was no problem if they were dating of course... I was just shocked.</p><p>Niall barged up to Liam and put the call on speaker.</p><p>"See ya later babes. "<br/>Someone said from the other side. And it was confirmed. That accent was so unique that only a single person had it in school. I was so damn sure.... Just gotta get Liam to accept it to me.</p><p>"Hey Mr. Boyfriend. Niall Horan and Harry Styles here. You're dating our best friend and we need to approve of you. "</p><p>A chuckle which I assume was his, came from his side while Liam tried to slap the phone away from Niall's hands on our side.</p><p>After Niall was done giving a serious talking to, he turned to look at me expectantly.</p><p>"Hey, um.... Do you by any chance like art? "<br/>I felt smug when I saw Liam's eyes widen. And it seemed like Niall still hadn't figured it out, the idiot.</p><p>"Y-yeah. "</p><p>"Well then say hi to your mate for me, yeah? "</p><p>"S-sure."</p><p>"Goodbye then, have fun with Li here, we'll see you tomorrow. "</p><p>Liam kept staring at me with wide fearful eyes as he spoke up. <br/>"Actually, can I speak to you for a second there love? "</p><p>Liam rushed into the bathroom and locked the door behind him.</p><p>Niall looked at me in anticipation but I couldn't just tell him what I found out without Liam's permission. Especially taken the situation.</p><p>"Aren't you gonna tell me who and how? "</p><p>I shake my head holding back a giggle. Niall will just have to find out on his own.</p><p>Just then Liam walked out of the bathroom fumbling with his hands. He looked at me shyly and asked<br/>"How did you find out? "</p><p>"Your contact picture and that name. Also, the accent was a perfect giveaway. Gawd! You guys are damn cheesy. "</p><p>Liam flushed bright red.</p><p>"No, it wasn't. "Niall interrupted.</p><p>Both Liam and I turned to look at Niall with a questioning look.</p><p>" The accent wasn't a giveaway. " Niall grumbled.</p><p>"Was too"</p><p>"Was not"</p><p>"You're just not observant enough my faux blonde friend. "</p><p>"Whatever. What was his cheesy picture? "</p><p>Liam glared at me daring me to even let a word out. Too bad I never take him seriously.</p><p>"Y'know the typical kiss on the cheek."</p><p>"And who might he be? "</p><p>I looked at Liam for assurance and he nodded in silent agreement. We both started speaking at the same time.</p><p>***********************<br/><b><em>Louis' POV</em></b></p><p>When I heard the keys turning the lock, I prayed that Zayn had forgotten all about the interrogation he had in store for me. And I had almost thought that I had gotten away when a hand reached out from behind handing me a cup of tea just the way I like it.</p><p>Zayn sat down beside me and stretched his arm behind me without touching me with a look to ask if it was okay.</p><p>I nodded and shuffled so that I was pressed to his side with him wrapping his arms around me.</p><p>"Are you ready to tell me what happened? "</p><p>I could feel my cuts itching and I reached to scratch them before telling him about the story of the student who kissed me. But Zayn held onto my wrists like he knew what I was feeling from what he had seen living with me for three years.</p><p>By the end I had told him every single detail from how Harry had tried making moves on me to how he had kissed me and my eyes filled with tears and I could feel my own body stiffen.</p><p>"And that's not even the worst part. I'd be heartbroken if he did that to me. "</p><p>Zayn moved me away from him ignoring the unintentional whimper that came from me.</p><p>"What do you mean? "</p><p>"I think I might have some sort of feelings for him... " I mumbled feeling guilty for having confirmed what had been stirring inside me.</p><p>Zayn kept staring at me. Obviously. He just learned that a teacher had a crush on his student. It's pretty obvious he's disgusted.</p><p>"Who? "</p><p>"Harry Styles. "</p><p>Something which seemed like a look of realization passed through his face. Maybe he had doubted all along.</p><p>"I know you're probably is disgusted with me. I'll leave if you want me to."<br/>I got up front the sofa set it a heavy heart.</p><p>"Wait. What? Why? "<br/>I sighed. I was too tired to explain. He'd figure it out himself.</p><p>"Don't go! I don't hate you.... "</p><p>His face told me there was something else he wanted to add.</p><p>"I understand what you feel. "</p><p>Wait.......... Did I hear right? <br/>Zayn liked someone? A student?! Why hadn't he told me?</p><p>"Care to elaborate? "</p><p>Zayn still refused to meet my eyes. He just played with his feet, stalling.</p><p>"I am in love with a student myself. "</p><p>Oh. That's good. I'm not the only one who likes...... WAIT LOVE?! <br/>Did he say love?! Ohmygod!</p><p>"Awwww" I cooed as annoyingly as I can. I pinched his cheeks and enjoyed his tomato red face.</p><p>"Wittle Zayniekins is in wuv! Who is it? "</p><p>"Liam."</p><p>I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!</p><p>"Wait... Our Liam? The puppy dog Liam? That sweet guy whose friends with Harry? "</p><p>Zayn just nodded. I can't believe this! Why did I never notice? <br/><em>Because you are a good for nothing only useful for your body.</em></p><p>I ignored the voice in my head. This moment was Zayn's.</p><p>"Didn't I tell you that he had a crush on you? "</p><p>Zayn burst out into nervous laughter at that. Poor guy. I think I broke him with the pressure.</p><p>"Funny story... I knew before you told me."</p><p>"How? "</p><p>"We're kinda dating? "</p><p>This just keeps getting better! <br/>Zayn Malik had a boyfriend!<br/>Who he is in love with! <br/>Who is a student! <br/>Who is friends with Harry...</p><p>I surprised him with a whack on his head as a congratulatory gift. <br/>"And you never found the need to tell me? "</p><p>Zayn nodded still refusing to meet my eyes.</p><p>"Obviously." I scoffed. I deserved to know this! But I get why he didn't tell me too.</p><p>I sat down beside him and pulled him for a hug.</p><p>"Who else knows? "</p><p>"Harry and Niall by now.. "</p><p>On hearing Harry's name my mind went back to today afternoon. And I felt so lost. Because my heart started pounding with happiness when I see him but the fear that pours in makes that feel very small.</p><p>I think I just stared off to space because the next thing I knew, Zayn sat beside me again with a pizza on the table in front of us.</p><p>"Lou, trust me. I don't think he's like Stan and the others. I understand how wrong it was to do that to you but the kid didn't know. "</p><p>Getting no reaction from me, he changed the topic. <br/>"Do you want to talk to Liam? "</p><p>*************************</p><p>"Mr. Tomlinson! How are you feeling? Zayn told me you were sick. "</p><p>So Harry hadn't told them about our........ encounter today, huh?</p><p>"I'm feeling good. I might be back to school in a day or two. "</p><p>Liam kept starting to say something but kept dropping it. I could sense how nervous he was from here.</p><p>"Just say what you have to, Liam. I won't get mad. I promise. "</p><p>"Are you okay with this? Me and Zayn I mean. I know people may find it disgusting and horrible and illegal but truthfully sir, it's just pure and beautiful-"</p><p>"I don't have a problem with it. Zayn my best mate and you are my favorite student! And call me Louis outside school. "</p><p>A loud crash and shouts and groans disturbed our quiet peaceful conversation.</p><p>"Sorry Louis, that's just Harry and Niall messing around. "</p><p>"You guys are quite close huh? "</p><p>"Yeah. We tell each other everything and trust each other with our hearts. We don't have secrets within the group."</p><p>"I have a secret! " Harry shouted out and I could literally imagine the look Liam gave him.</p><p>"He's drunk. Doesn't know what he is talking about. Or maybe he does... the little fucker's been hiding things from us and won't say who he kissed today and why that's made him upset"</p><p>Liam had started mumbling halfway through the dialogue and I don't think he realized that I could hear him.</p><p>My heart clenched with a bittersweet feeling when I found out he felt bad about our kiss. Maybe he wasn't a bad guy after all. I just have to let myself trust him</p><p>"Hey, Loubear!" Harry's slurry voice called out. I had a feeling the call had been put in speaker so I did the same and motioned Zayn next to me.</p><p>" H-harry. "</p><p>Zayn put his arms around me and made me rest on his chest just the way he used to when I used to have all those nightmares.</p><p>"I like you, babe... You're cute and innocent but mysterious and so so so so so sweet. And I'm sorry."</p><p>I could hear Liam gasp in realization. There goes my plan of no one but Zayn knowing.</p><p>"You're too beautiful to cry. And I just wanted to kiss those tears away but I knew that would make everything worse. Please forgive me Lou.... I'll never do it again."</p><p>A giggle escaped from me as I spoke again.</p><p>"Of course I forgive you, Harry. "</p><p>"Yay! " Harry squealed and everything went silent with a thud.</p><p>"Harry fell asleep, Louis. I'm sorry. I didn't know it was you he kissed."</p><p>"He didn't kiss me. I have no idea what he was talking about. I just played along so that it won't agitate him. "<br/>I lied through my teeth. Zayn can give me as many disapproving glances as he wants. I am not letting anyone in. My life is not public property.</p><p>"Oh. I guess he just thought you were whoever he kissed then. Sorry about that. "</p><p>"I'll see you, tomorrow babe. "<br/>Zayn called out.</p><p>"I love you. " Both said together before cutting the call.</p><p>If only someday I could have such a beautiful relationship with someone.... <br/><br/><br/></p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <b>Harry's POV</b>
  </em>
</p><p>I woke up groaning due to the throbbing headache that I was experiencing. Thank god it was the weekend and I didn't have to go to school today. That would've been hell.<br/>I looked around the room and realized that I was still at Liam's but I couldn't find the lad anywhere in here.</p><p>Niall, on the other hand, was snoring beside me, bundled up in all the sheets that he had snatched from me sometime at night.</p><p>I went downstairs following the odd smells of burning food that needed my saving. And..... I wished I hadn't.</p><p>I seriously did not need the image of my best friend getting dry-humped on the kitchen counter by my art teacher. I cleared my throat so hard that I choked and started a coughing fit. Well, at least those two were not torturing my *cough* poor virgin eyes anymore.</p><p>Both of them stood in front of me with overly flushed cheeks and heavy breathing and the scene was almost comical if it hadn't been for the fact that their boners were more than obvious.</p><p>"I suggest you calm your regions before poor Nialler comes down here for his morning sausages...." I said casually as I walked into the kitchen to save the poor food that apparently had been neglected during those two's make-out session.</p><p>" How are you Zayn? "</p><p>Zayn looked at me surprised that I was talking to him do casually without even a glare at him</p><p>"M Fine... "</p><p>" And how is Mr. Tommo today? " I asked nervously not caring to hide how nervous I was for his answer.</p><p>I kept my eyes focused on the food in front of me so that I didn't want to face Liam's suspicious look and Zayn knowing one.</p><p>Oh.</p><p>Louis clearly told him. <br/>I wonder if Zayn hates me for doing that to his best friend.</p><p>"He's fine, Harry. A little tired but that's all. "</p><p>Things grew awkwardly silent at that. Zayn never took his eyes off me and it was pressurizing me. I felt like I was going to have a breakdown from all the tension filled in the room.</p><p>As I slid the breakfast onto four plates, I could see Liam glancing from Zayn to me curiously. <br/>"What's going on guys? Why are you both acting so weird? "</p><p>"I don't know what you're talking about babe.. " <br/>I could see that Zayn was pretty nervous. Maybe Louis had told him to tell anyone.</p><p>"Nonsense Zayn. Harry, is Louis the one you-"</p><p>"AAAAA AAAAA AAAAA aah uh huh huh!!!!!!!!! "All of us looked to the direction of the stairs to see Niall roll down them. His eyes looked bloodshot and anyone could tell that he was having a horrible hangover.</p><p>" Tripped... " He mumbled as Liam and I burst out laughing. Zayn on the other hand was trying to be polite and not laugh, most probably because he had to get Niall's approval to date Liam.</p><p>"Oi shut up! At least I'm not a baby giraffe like Harry. "<br/>That shut me up. Mainly because it's true. I am really clumsy. But I took the chance I had and tried to get Liam to forget his previous question.</p><p>"Heeeeeyyyyyyyy." I put my offended face on.<br/>"I'm not that clumsy am I, Li? "</p><p>"No Harry, you're much worse. " Liam said with an expressionless face. <br/>Great friends I've got.</p><p>Breakfast went fairly well as the conversation shifted into comical topics. Zayn turned out to be cooler than what I had expected and though it was awkward seeing him here in front of me outside school, I knew that I could never oppose the relationship that my best friend had with him.</p><p>"Babe, I have to go now. Louis should have woken up and I don't like the idea of my best friend being alone at home while I hang out with you guys"</p><p>Liam looked disappointed but he nodded anyway.</p><p>This was my chance...</p><p>" He can hang out with us! So you and Li get some more time together. "</p><p>To my despair, Zayn shook his head.</p><p>"Harry, I don't think that's -"</p><p>" That's a GREAT idea..!! Harry, you're a genius! "</p><p>Liam jumped around with his puppy dog eyes fixed on Zayn. And anyone could see that my art teacher was a goner.</p><p>"I'll ask him if he wants to hang out. " Zayn said with a sigh. "But if he says that he doesn't want to, I'm going back to him. "</p><p>Wow. He really is a true friend, isn't he?</p><p>The three of us nodded our heads frantically while we gathered around our art teacher, waiting for him to call our English teacher to hang out with us.</p><p>Zayn refused to put the call on speaker so all we could hear were the muffled ringing sounds that we preened to hear.</p><p>"Hello? "</p><p>Woah! Was his morning voice always this hot?</p><p>"Hey, Lou. How're you feeling now? "</p><p>"Uh-huh"</p><p>" You up for hanging out with Li and the boys today? "</p><p>Liam snatched the device from Zayn's hand before Zayn could even acknowledge whatever reply came from the other side.</p><p>" Please, Louis? Let's all hang out! I really want to talk to you face to face and spend some more time with Z. "</p><p>He paused for a while during which I think Louis was saying something back.</p><p>" I'll see you in an hour then. Bye!"</p><p>Shit! <br/>I looked at my reflection in the mirror and cringed. <br/>Red eyes and greasy hair did not do well when your crush was hanging out with you.</p><p>" Guys,  I'm gonna head to the shower. "</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I was trying to tame my curly locks when the doorbell rang downstairs.</p><p>" Arggh..! Fuck it."</p><p>I ran down the stairs to see Liam leading Louis into the hall. And I couldn't take my eyes off that sweet creature. His usual quiff was absent today and his hair lay flat on this forehead. He looked so tired and frail but it just made him look a lot softer.</p><p>I saw the way he tensed when I entered the room and I would be lying if I said that it didn't hurt a bit. I have to make this right no matter what. I don't know what made him react the way he did but I feel so bad that I was the reason why he was upset yesterday and, according to how Zayn's treating him, has not yet recovered.</p><p>"Harry, sit down mate."<br/>Stupid Niall.</p><p>Coming out of my thoughts for the hundredth time after the incident at school, I noticed that everyone was staring at me. Seriously? Does this lot really have nothing better to do? </p><p>I quickly took the farther seat possible from Louis while the others started chatting away once again. I mean...I didn't want him to feel uncomfortable with me hovering over him and obviously, it was too soon for me to try and get him to trust me again.</p><p>The precious angel was staring at the floor like there was something interesting going on there while Zayn kept a hand wrapped around him and played with his hair from time to time. </p><p>I decided to pay attention to the other lads as well. Niall was laughing his ass off as Zayn told him the story of how they got together. And seriously, it was hilarious. I don't blame Ni for laughing his arse off for this one. Until...</p><p>"A-and then he started bawling his eyes out right there in my classroom after I kissed him. Idiot really made me think that I screwed up and was going to jail." Zayn ended and I felt myself glance at Louis again. Zayn seemed to trail off with that as well. Looks like he just realized what he said considering how he kept glancing from me to Louis.</p><p>And it looked like that reminded Louis of our time together as well because the next thing I know, he was jumping off the couch and asking for the bathroom with a clearly nervous look on his face. Maybe I should talk to him...</p><p>"I can show you where it is!" Niall exclaimed before I could say a word and dragged my smol bean away from us. </p><p>What was that I said before? </p><p>Oh yeah! Stupid Irish Leprechaun. </p><p>Obviously, my eyes followed them out of the door. What if Niall was handling Louis too roughly? He was so delicate already!</p><p>When I turned back around I swear I made up my mind to get new friends. And new teachers. Sheesh! Both of them were staring at me so creepily anyone would think that they were hypnotized. And maybe they were. With my good looks and charm, you never know ;)</p><p>"What was that?!" Liam asked clearly freaking out about not knowing what was happening.</p><p>"Ummm...." </p><p>"Babe, what are you talking abou-"</p><p>"And you, my dear boyfriend, shut up! There's obviously something that you, Louis and Harry here, are hiding and I demand to know what." Li said with a huff. </p><p>What do I say? What do I say? What do I say? I really have no clue. I don't think Louis would want anyone to know what happened and honestly, Liam is going to give me so much shit if he finds out. I don't want that!</p><p>Liam just sat there getting more and more pissed at Zayn and me. And neither of us literally had any idea what to do except stare at each other. </p><p>Oh gosh! The silence was dragging on for AGES. We could literally hear Niall drag Louis to the kitchen and trying to persuade him to let him have food in class by bribing him with carrots!</p><p>Why carrots?! I have no idea...But back to the matter at hand.</p><p>"Uhhhh...." I started since again praying to the heavens to give me something. ANYTHING. </p><p>"Harry don't even think about it." Liam said. Dammit. He knows me too well. "Was it Louis that you kissed yesterday?" He asked suddenly. Wait, what?! How did he... I looked at Zayn for guidance but he looked so out of it I would have laughed in any other situation. </p><p>"Your drunk ass asked him for forgiveness yesterday over the phone." Li said with a sigh. </p><p>Oh. That makes sense. Seems like there is no point hiding it after all. maybe he could help me figure out where it went wrong.</p><p>I leaned back onto the couch and rubbed my eyes to stop the tears that I could feel fill my eyes. before I nodded. "Yeah. I kissed Louis yesterday and it didn't go well." </p><p>Liam had a look of pity in his eyes as he looked at me. So did Zayn. And why wouldn't they? Their teacher-student love story was going beautifully well. Why can't I have that with Louis? Liam opened his mouth to say something. But then...</p><p>"WAIT. LARRY STYLINSON IS REAL?!"</p><p>There stood Niall Horan, my best mate, beside a freaked out Louis Tomlinson. And the idiot had no idea how much more awkward he made the entire situation.</p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter 8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>
    <span class="u">Louis' POV</span>
  </b>
</p><p>I have to be honest, Niall is a pretty fun lad to be around. He came along to show me the way to the bathroom but of course, he had to bring up eating. </p><p>"Dude I swear. If you let me eat in class I'll- I'll pay you! I'll make you my famous Mac and Cheese Buffalo Burger every single day. Just say the word." He kept egging me on as he followed me like a puppy that is wagging its tail. Honestly, if I wasn't in the middle of losing my shit then and there I would have loved to see how he convinces me.</p><p>"Hold on Niall." I said locking the door to go about with my business. I took a deep breath and slide down by the wall before I rested my head on the bathtub. Stupid Zayn speaking without thinking and making the room awkward. I mean, yeah only me and harry had felt it but it was still there. </p><p>I can't close my eyes. Believe me, I've tried. Ever since that insanely adorable boy kissed me, my mind keeps flashing back to that scene every time I just as much as blink. Dear God. This is going to be the end of me. I-I don't want this. </p><p>I can't let myself think of Harry that way. His deep voice that turned oh-so husky as he leaned down to kiss me. I can't want that! Not if I don't want a repeat of what happened the last time. I can't let my walls down if I don't want to get hurt again-especially for Harry. </p><p>But what if...what if he actually wants this? If he actually feels like I do and he is just showing the courage that I so clearly lacked? I mean, the look on his precious face today was so close to that of a hurt puppy I just wanted to go sit on his lap and pet his hair. And he did say sorry...</p><p>Urggh! STOP! LOUEH YOU IDIOT! I can hear Zayn's voice say to me. I mean, it's no surprise that the sane part of me takes inspiration from him. That man has been there for me after months of meeting me, more than anyone I consider family. </p><p>But going back to my thoughts...</p><p>I can't like Harry! This was just a way to disaster.</p><p>Well, I guess I'll figure something out. I mean these feelings aren't going to be here forever, are they? It's just a silly crush on a silly high school kid. And if a year isn't enough, Harry's a senior. I just have to hold on for a year and then never see his face ever again. </p><p>I get up and splash some water on my burning face. My reflection looked awful...wow I was a mess. But whatever right? It's not like I have anyone to impress here. </p><p>Still, I comb my hand through my hair, trying to make it at presentable at the least, take one last breath and open the door, preparing myself for an excited Niall Horan... Let's just say that kid doesn't disappoint. Lord knows how he managed this but there he stood right in front of me as I opened the door with a bunch of carrots that he dangled in front of me. </p><p>"I figured it out Tommo! School magazine says you're a sucker for carrots." And the next thing I knew, I was handed an armful of carrots as a bribe. Too bad that magazine didn't know a joke when they saw it huh?</p><p>It took some time but soon Niall had moved on to talking about other stuff and let me keep the carrots back before we went back to the others, THANK GOD! Don't get me wrong...Niall's a brilliant lad and I loved being distracted by his antics but I just don't have the energy to match his level right now. But I can imagine if we knew each other two years ago we would've been a great chaotic duo. </p><p>Hopefully, he turns his attention to someone else and I can get a little bit of a breather. </p><p>"Yeah. I kissed Louis yesterday and it didn't go well." Why did Harry sound so sad when he said that? I- I'm not worth that tone. He can't really have any feelings for me. He can do so much better! Why would he do that to himself? Is he okay? Maybe I should talk to him or something...</p><p>"WAIT. LARRY STYLINSON IS REAL?!" Niall screamed into my ear. </p><p>What's a Larry Stylinson?</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <span class="u">Harry's POV</span>
  </b>
</p><p>Crap! I really should've paid attention. And now I've gone and made it more awkward for him. And what is Niall going on about? What's a Larry Stylinson? I guess there's only one way to find out.</p><p>I asked Niall what he meant and thankfully it looks like I wasn't the only one who was confused with the shit he just said. Every single one of us turned to Niall, waiting for him to explain. Louis went back to his little spot beside Zayn, cuddling to his side, looking really deep in thought. I really screwed that up now. </p><p>"How do you guys not know what Larry is?" Let's just say Niall looked like his puppy just wrecked his entire house. </p><p>" Louis and Harry...Larry! Jesus it's like I'm living with a bunch of cavemen." </p><p>Oh...it's a ship name. Why does Niall have a ship name for us already? He never knew what happened between us anyway. Oop- never mind. He was telling us more about it. </p><p>" The moment we first met Louis I swear these two only had eyes for each other. And I bet you everything I have that Tommo here didn't even notice me until Harry pointed me out two him. The chemistry that these two share, you'd have to blind not to ship them" </p><p>Well, Niall's got that wrong. there is no way Louis liked me in the beginning. I'm not even sure how he feels about me now! Sometimes it feels like I have a chance with him but then the next minute I am convinced he hates me and now after what Niall said...</p><p>I can't help but glance at Louis and see how he reacts to it. Why was he blushing so hard? And he looks so guilty. Wait, was Niall right about this?! DO I REALLY HAVE A CHANCE?! OH MY GOD !!</p><p>"...of course I never knew this idiot would act on it. The man's a teacher Harreh!"</p><p>The room fell into an awkward silence after that. Yes I know Louis's a teacher and it was really stupid of me to try something. But I couldn't just leave him like that after I upset him that morning could I?</p><p>"...Zayn, can we go now? I want to get some shut-eye." A soft and low voice broke the silence. </p><p>He sounded so sad and broken.</p><p>What made him this way? Was it me? I don't think I can lie with myself if it was. </p><p>"Y-yeah sure Lou" Zayn's voice matched Louis's as he nervously wiped his sweaty palms on his jeans. "Why don't you go wait for me by the car? I'll be there in a bit. Just need to say goodbye to Li, okay?" </p><p>Louis nodded and walked away all the while refusing to take his eyes off the ground. Seeing him like that...I NEED to keep him safe. He doesn't deserve this shit I placed on his shoulders. All I wanted was for him to open up to me. </p><p>"Well lads, thank you for having us. I'm sure we'll hang out more once Louis feels a little better." I glance at Zayn to see him give me an understanding smile that I accepted with a nod. </p><p>I hope he's right. </p><p>Zayn left after giving Liam a kiss goodbye and promises to call later that night. And as the door closed behind him, I couldn't help it.</p><p>I burst out into tears while a concerned Niam tried their best to comfort me.</p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter 9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>
    <em>
      <span class="u">Louis's POV</span>
    </em>
  </b>
</p><p>I stretched, groaning as the bell rang everywhere in the school building. I wasn't ready to see Harry yet. Hell, I don't even know if I can face Niall and Liam after what they know.  And the fact that the last time all of us were together it was so awkward...</p><p>And after spending the rest of the weekend in bed, ignoring everything and everyone, including Zayn banging on my door to get me to come out, I finally managed to muster up some energy for the new week. </p><p>As the class filled with random teenagers, I tried to get my body to relax like my therapist had shown me ages ago. I could feel my nails digging into my latest addition of cuts last night but honestly, I don't care at this point. I just hope they don't bleed and traumatize some poor kid. </p><p>"If you're quite finished, can everyone take their seats please?" </p><p>Hmm... I should be a bit more cheerful maybe. Wait, were the boys here? </p><p>I glanced over and for some reason, my chest just hurt so bad when I saw Harry's seat empty. Niall and Liam were so obviously staring at me with this really sad look in their eyes and...let's just move on. this is going to be such an awkward class. </p><p>I went back to my table to gather my notes as the class settled down but the heavy load of emotion stuck in my throat just seems to refuse to let me speak. I gulped a couple of times trying to focus on the class that seemed to be waiting for me to say something. But where was Harry? Why isn't he here? </p><p>
  <em>He must be done with your stupid drama.</em>
</p><p>Stop thinking about Harry!! He's a kid. Kids skip school. </p><p>Yeah, that's right. He's just being a teenager. </p><p>I took a deep breath and turned to the class with the happiest face I could muster up. Someone give me an Oscar! Please! How do I go about life entertaining so many kids when all I want is to...not be...NEVERMIND.</p><p>As soon as the bell rang and my students rushed out as if they were afraid I carried some deadly disease or something, I let myself drop my act and rest my head. Thank god for free periods. My eyes felt heavy and I was drifting off to sleep. About time actually...my sleep schedule's gone to shit. </p><p>"Mr. Tomlinson..."</p><p>Of course, someone needed something. Oh, and of course it's Liam...and Niall. </p><p>"Louis..."</p><p>Wait. Zayn?! What was he doing here? He has a class this period. I swear this kid is going to get himself into trouble someday. </p><p>"I teach art, mate. I don't have to teach them how to draw" Zayn said with a scoff as he looked around the classroom. But what was he doing here? </p><p>"Okay, but why are you guys here?" </p><p>I mean, obviously, I know what's coming. But if they think even for a moment that we are going to discuss this they are mistaken. I just- I just need space. Them cornering me like this makes me feel so out of control and I really don't like it. </p><p>"Loui- Mr. T, are you okay? We talked to Harry and he feels awful about making you uncomfortable and - "</p><p>Liam, bless him, looked so worried as he approached me trying to get me to look at him or something but honestly, I couldn't think straight at this point. HE WAS COMING TO THE OTHER SIDE OF THE TABLE. Big red flags popped up in my brain and I was trying so hard not to freak out. </p><p>I mean logically I know that it doesn't really mean anything but to me, at that moment, that just so easily broke such a large boundary between teacher and student and I am not okay with it. </p><p>"I keep staring at the floor though, making sure that my inner panic didn't seep out. I'll be damned if I let them know that part of me. </p><p>"Louis"</p><p>"Huh?"</p><p>Zayn was kneeling in front of me with a concerned look on his face. He didn't say a word as he searched my eyes looking for an answer that he knew I refused to give him right now. A few seconds later, he nodded, as though he found it, whatever it is, and backed away with an expression of relief. </p><p>"He just zoned out guys, no big deal."</p><p>The younger boys were looking at me with so much worry and my heart just melted for them. Aww, bless them. No matter whatever was happening with me and their friend right now these lads seemed to care so much about me, and not just as a teacher. </p><p>"I'm alright guys, do I not look alright?" I asked them with a warm and surprisingly genuine smile on my face. They seemed like good lads, and obviously, they have to be if Zayn has to be dating one of them. I've learned that Zayn's usually right about these things.</p><p>Maybe if I just make sure not to get to close. that should be alright, right?</p><p>Liam shifts his eyes between me and his boyfriend before he takes a deep breath and nods aggressively. </p><p>"Yeah yeah, okay." </p><p>And that seemed to be enough to ease Niall's worries. </p><p>"Well Tommo, if you say you're okay, then we trust you. But mate, next time don't run out on us okay? We love having you around. Now, c'mon Liam, I WANT FOOD!"</p><p>Wow, okay. Can't say I'm surprised but I am so glad for Niall's trust right now. I can't tell if I'm just hiding it well, if he hasn't noticed or if he just chose not to say anything but whatever it is, I. AM. GLAD.</p><p>I glare at my best friend wondering what he's still doing here.</p><p>"Woah Tommo, you know that didn't fool me. But I'm just gonna be here for you and when you're ready to talk we'll talk." </p><p>"Oh, and don't you dare skip out on lunch." </p><p>With that, my best friend was out of the door and my head was back on the table.</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So I do this all the time. Start writing something and as soon as I am satisfied with everything, I get such a serious case of writer's block its annoying. But this time I'm gonna push through it and finish the story. So sorry if the chapter isn't that eventful but just consider this a filler or something because I don't want to leave you all without updates but I don't want to write anything major like this either.</p>
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<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Chapter 10</h2></a>
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      <span class="u">Harry's POV</span>
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</p><p>It's been more than a month since that day Zayn and Louis came over and hung out with us but things were still as awkward as possible. Classes were a joke with how actively Louis kept avoiding looking at us and how all three of us literally just let it happen. I mean I get it okay? You don't want anything to do with me but this is literally too much! But yeah, Liam, Niall and I figured that we should give him the space he clearly wants and maybe he'll warm up to us again. </p><p>Actually...no.</p><p>We wanted to talk to Louis so bad. Maybe if we just get him to talk to me he'll see that I respect him enough to keep it purely platonic if that's what he really wants. And that'll solve everything right? This is all just one big confusion that we can talk through. But Zayn thinks Louis needs space and he asked us to give him how much ever time he needs. And of course, Liam is so smitten the moment he found out that his boyfriend had a difference in opinion, he backed off. </p><p>But who knows right? He's Louis's best friend. Maybe he does know better than any of us. And that's why I have resorted to pining from a distance, looking at my teacher from a distance. Wow. How does he have so much happiness in his face while talking about...whatever we were learning in class right now? </p><p>The bell rang breaking me out of my thoughts and I packed my bag to vanish as I usually do these days after his class. Seriously... How long was I going to have to continue with this? </p><p>"Harry, can you stay back for a minute? I need to talk to you about your grades." </p><p>I visibly cringe at the first thing Louis has said to me in so long. Shit! I knew I wasn't doing as great in his class but you can't blame me! there's just so much going on here that I don't want to think about some book. </p><p>My friends turn to look at me and I nod. I'll be okay. Louis asked me to stay himself. And this time I'll do everything right. As they walk out of class and shut the door behind them, I turn to Louis who seems weirdly focussed on his hands. I didn't want to move, scared that I would cross a line again. All I could do was stare at him, begging him to say something. Was this all just because of me? </p><p>"Grab a seat. We need to talk"</p><p>I nodded even though he still wasn't looking at me and sat facing him, his table placing too much distance between us. I wanted to go closer, hold his hand...tell him that everything was going to be okay but of course, I couldn't. And so, we sat in silence for a few more minutes. </p><p>"Umm...Lou-Mr. T, are you okay?" </p><p>"Yeah jus-just give me a minute." </p><p>I can't help but feel guilty at how terrified he looks sitting in front of me. As if I was some kind of monster and he was scared that even looking at me would be his end. I didn't know I was following every deep breath he took with mine until he looked up and I was breathtaken. There they were. The beautiful blue eyes that keep me locked away, unable to move. And they looked so much bluer this close, when they looked back directly into mine. </p><p>"Clearly there's a lot we need to talk about but I really need to discuss your grades first." Lou said with a chuckle. I finally let out the breath that I couldn't stop holding and smiled at him. </p><p>"I know they're not that great" I said with a small smile. "I just had some stuff in my mind."</p><p>The small bark of laughter that left his mouth at this point literally feels like the best thing that ever happened to me. He seemed more relaxed, like he didn't have to keep his guard up around me. Things felt like they were okay for the first time since that kiss.</p><p>"Harry they're pathetic! Do you even listen to what I say in class?" </p><p>Well... "Of course I do" I scoff at him. "I just...maybe more of your voice than what you're speaking about. You have a great voice."</p><p>He sighed, the tired looked back in his face. No things were going great! They can't turn to shit again so soon! "I'm sorry!" I blurt out before he could say anything. I was close to tears at this point. Why do I screw stuff up?</p><p>I was terrified to look back up but I had to know what he was thinking. Was he going to walk away and just...I don't know, give up on me? Are teachers allowed to do that? He looked at me with a sad smile on his face but somehow it felt like a reassurance that I was okay. That we were okay. </p><p>"I'm flattered that you think of me that way" But...? There's always a but after a sentence like that! Hell in this case we already know that there is a but and we experienced the consequences of not listening to them but as well!</p><p>"And I would be lying if I said I didn't some kind of way about you as well..." Wait what? He likes me too? Well, I mean I kinda knew that already. I felt something between us which is why I made a move on him in the first place and how he looked when Niall brought it up was pretty clear. But it still felt great to actually hear him say it. </p><p>Maybe the excitement in my face was too obvious because he looked so nervous at this point I realized even before he said a word that we wouldn't go beyond this confession. But...</p><p>"But I'm not looking for any kind of relationship now, darling. Let alone one with a student. And I hope you can respect that." </p><p>My heart felt heavy in my chest but I guess I'll just deal with it. I gulp down all the emotions that coursed through me in the past five minutes and looked back at him with a smile. I hope he knows that I understand and that he can trust me. </p><p>"Y-yeah. Of course. We'll do this however you want us to. It's totally up to you." </p><p>The smile on his face at that point was worth everything in the world. And this was the face that I wanted him to wear for the rest of his life. He deserves to be happy and if me backing off would do to him, we back off is exactly what I'll do. </p><p>"Thank you, Harry. But we can be friends, right? I wouldn't be opposed to hanging out with you and avoiding each other seems pretty hard when we have a class together and our best friends want to snog each other's faces off, innit?"</p><p>Hallelujah! My mind was throwing a party inside my head as I nodded at what he said with a grin. I could feel the tension lift off the room and everything just felt so much lighter all of a sudden! If friends is what he wants to be, friends is what he is going to get! I am going to show him that he can count on me and maybe...just maybe he might want something more in the future. </p><p>"Now back to your grades." Louis said with a cough. Well...I guess it IS time that I start working hard. </p><p>We spent god knows how long with me trying to convince him to tutor me to get me back on track while he stayed firm that I'll be okay if I "Just pay attention in class, Harry". After a while of back and forth, we made a deal. I get to be tutored if I still need help after I genuinely and seriously start working for his subject. </p><p>"I should get going."</p><p>I stood up and stretched my limbs before I noticed him staring at the small bit of skin where my shirt lifted. I can't help the smirk on my face as he noticed me looking at him. Oh my god! He is so adorable when he is blushing! Satisfied with the reaction I got out of him, I held his gaze as I walked towards the door. </p><p>"Goodbye, Louis." </p><p>"Goodbye, Harry" I hear a soft voice as I closed the door. </p><p> </p>
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